Hillary vs Donald

Very far removed from the US politics, but I have to say I really like Hillary. Its easy to be a Michele Obama, be a great orator, and to be liked for being a first lady who is intelligent and knowledgeable. It's way tougher being Hillary, being unapologetic about being ambitious, and being disliked for it.

Speechless

A big crowd congregates opposite the Asia Square building. I wonder if there's been a fire breakout or an accident of some sort. When I realize what's going on, I have my palm on my face.

A wise man once said, "If you feel stupid, remind yourself that there are people out there looking for Pokemon." 

Love this pic of the Indian Olympians

These women look fierce, determined and focussed; and it's such a different kind of attractiveness! So much grittier, prettier (and at the same time, more primal) than women posing with duck-lipped pouts. Delightfully earthy. Love it.

Banned Baja Bewakoof

A lot has been said & written about the "India's Daughter" documentary. I couldn't get myself to watch it. I read the excerpts & it made my stomach churn. I don't see any value in watching a madman's rants (and that's a very personal opinion), but what an idiot of a minister thought of banning the film! Seriously, you thought that would be the best response to public anger?

It's true

Malaysian Airlines & the worst kind of luck

When the first plane disappeared, I remember feeling scared and skeptical - doubting the whole system in which a huge airplane can go missing despite all those radars, gadgets, black boxes, the works.

This time though, I'm feeling depressed. The whole incident is a telling sign of what our world has come to. The utter lack of humanity is staggering. Loss of lives used for political one-upmanship & media circus shows...so depressing I can't write anymore!  

Brazil vs Chile

Being that penalty kick striker must be the world's most thankless & dreadful job! The next day, nobody remembers the perfect kick, but even years later, the fans will still remember that miss which caused their team to be thrown out of a World Cup they could've potentially won. Can't begin to imagine the nerves those men must need to control!

Rahul on Arnab's show

Oh dear. Watched the Rahul Gandhi interview on YouTube. Clearly, not a wordsmith.

Inspired

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

- Mark Twain

A non believer

Oh the number of people who tie ribbons & throw coins into fountains hoping for a miracle (or at the least believing that its worth a shot)!!! Have you ever done it?

Another new year resolution

Sometimes we focus too much on what we don't have. Its time to focus on & cherish the wonderful things we do have.

2011 in retrospect

Last year, I started a little tradition of writing my own My World this Year post :) So keeping with this new tradition, here's the year 2011 in retrospect:

2011 was the first year when I actually kept my new years' resolution (yippie!). It involved visits to the gym (with reducing frequency, but what the hell, I take credit for going at all). It also involved my first trekking expedition (my first time away from K; that was a difficult cord to sever); my first modelling gig (!!!); some great family holidays; some memorable work trips; some interesting new friends; reconnecting with some dear old friends; settling into the new home - -it was a busy year. It was also a tough year in many ways, but we did a good job of keeping our chin up.

The uncertainty at work still exists; but its affecting me far less now. The financial crisis has made me give destiny a free hand in determining where I'll go professionally; I'm not too fussed anymore.

Watching my dad's health deteriorate has been tough for me & my family. There are days I'm thankful I'm miles away from the chaos he wields on others in my family; and there are days I really miss being with my family. After all those teenage years of complaining about why my parents get to call all the shots; I've realised that being in charge is not all that glamorous. I miss being able to pin all my shortcomings on them! :)

This year, K grew up into a little boy. Not a baby, not a toddler, but a little boy. He makes his own decisions; succumbs to peer pressure more easily than I would like; wants to be a fireman; gives the best kisses ever; loves all things 'grown-up'; and has been pestering us for a bicycle. To our great disappointment, he's also become a Justin Beiber fan. I look back fondly at the days when he used to love Barney & Elmo.

My resolution for the new year: To skype home as frequently as possible.

A personal tragedy struck us on Sunday. We got a phone call from Dubai that we had lost a friend. To a mental-illness which we knew of, but never suspected it to be life-threatening in this fashion.

Seeing the tragedy of untimely death so closely has made our whole world questionable. The thought of people being transient - especially the ones we love so dearly - is excrutiating. Time starts to feel oddly powerful, a mercenary. The things that we keep ourselves busy seeking turn pointless, silly. Priorities re-stack. I know the grief will probably pass. But the feelings of futility & powerlessness? Maybe even guilt? Do they ever pass?

We are leaving for Dubai tonight to attend the funeral & I can't lose the big pit of emptiness I feel in my stomach at the thought of seeing his surviving family. The wife- my dear strong friend, the son, the mother. How do I empathise with them when I can't even bear the thought of being in their shoes? It haunts me.

The Joys of Parenting

I read this article in the NY Times today. Researchers trying to resolve the debate on whether there is a correlation between happiness & having kids. This is their interesting conclusion:

"The most striking findings revolved around parenthood and age. Whether it is a function of exhaustion, bickering over diapers or something inherently unpleasant about raising little children, the data doesn’t say, but parents under 30 are decidedly less happy than their child-free peers. Then, once parents hit 40, the relationship reverses and people with children are cheerier than those without."

The finding is not surprising, although I think its too west-centric. It would be interesting to see whether Asian parents under 30 enjoy their life as parents more than their western counterparts. The more individualistic the society you live in, the more likely you would perhaps be to resent the loss of personal freedom that happens when you have kids?

The worst days at work are made of this:

* I'm half-way through with making changes in a spreadsheet when Excel crashes & I have saved nothing.
* I fill-in an online form & the "Save/Submit" button at the bottom has turned a dissmal grey & my mouse does not have the power to save or submit all the information I've painstakingly typed out.
* I make a presentation in a new version of powerpoint but when I open it from a laptop with another version of powerpoint, all my pretty pie-charts are climbing on top of one another.
* I forget the Lotus Notes password I changed only a moment ago.

And people still think the Financial Crisis was tough on bankers!

2010 in retrospect

It's that time of the year again! 2010 flew by; it was probably the fastest and busiest year of my life. The little toddler at home was definitely the highlight of the year. I don't think I ever consciously chose it, but work, friends and rest of the family took a backseat in my life this year - I was too busy being a mum; it consumed all my energy and heart and soul. There's positive growth to report on that front - While in 2009 I was an anxious, apprehensive mum; in 2010 I was a more confident mum and happier for it. So K may be a sugar-junkie and late on his potty-training milestones; but he is perfect & I am unfussed.

While H adapted easily to being a banker by day & a dad by evening; I had difficulty taking off my mother-hat that easily and was caught wearing it at work many times! Fortunately, I have a hugely supportive bunch of people at work.

I watched more TV in 2010 than ever before. And used the 'pause' button on the tv remote more frequently then ever before. Dining-in was always prefered to going out; and there was never enough incentive to wear that pretty black dress. But off-late, I am getting myself out of the rut. I dropped a size this year; yay! That got me motivated to pay some attention to personal grooming. I have a love-hate relationship with my new hairstyle (I love it the day its blow-dried & styled in the salon; hate it the following day). And as soon as I finish writing this post, I'm going to get an appointment for a pedicure.

That brings me to my resolution for the next year - I want 2011 to be more about me. I think I'll always be a mother first (as if I have a choice about that!) but I know I can be other things too. It takes energy & time, and I will work towards finding that.

Starry Nights

I love star gazing. This weekend, we spent some quality geek-time looking at the sky through the telescope. I could go on about the different sights we enjoyed & admired; but then it would be like narrating an incident which is interesting only if you see it first-hand; not when you hear of it. I am however, going to blog about why I thought the experience was so special.

People love to go on top of tall buildings & insert coins into binoculours to see the tinyness of humanity & its creations below. Looking at the universe is exactly the opposite perspective & therefore special.

The expanse of the universe is a tremendous sight. You feel a sense of being inconsequential in size; and simultaneously feel like an essential & invaluable part in the scheme of things; like there must be an important purpose behind your existence in this mega-project called the universe. It prods you to question your beliefs & re-enforces them the next moment. And it makes you feel incredibly closer to those close to you.

What's going on lately

* I've been pondering lately whether I really know what the term "true calling" means. And if I do, is this it?

* I learnt that Atlas Shrugged is going to be a movie. And so is Life of Pi. Don't like the sound of that!

* The dilemma of a working mother has been nagging me quite persistently. Always treading that fine line between a 'good mother' and 'guilty mother' can be tiring. Seeing a completely guilt-free father doesn't help either.

* What's the saddest thing you've read recently? For me, it was this.

* Kabeer has 4 teeth now. And he's not afraid to use them. He has also decided that "papaya" is his favorite word.

* There are too many articles written about China, I agree. But thought this one was interesting. "Of the 22 Chinese corporations listed on the Fortune Global 500, none are privately held"....did not know that! By the way, I had an interesting conversation with two colleagues from work - one who grew up in Mao's China; another who grew up in pre-unification East Germany; and there was me who grew up in pre-liberalisation socialist India. It was weird how similar & dissimilar our experiences were!

I would've lost weight, but...

Dessert buffet = Bad idea !!

Moment of Realisation

Can't use the "I-had-a-baby" excuse forever....Must lose weight!