Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Experiences of a new mom

If I put my mind to it I could write a book about my 2 1/2-weeks worth of experiences as a new mom; but ever since we got Kabeer home I haven't had the time to indulge in idle thought & therefore the book will have to wait. I could however put this quick post together.

The first week back at home was what I call the "tornado week". Complete chaos & panic. By the end of the week, we had begun to believe that everything we're doing is wrong & that we're the worst parents ever. Particularly on that fateful night when Kabeer howled & cried for 5 hours at a stretch & we were close to tears ourselves (all the books & websites said that the baby's brain development is directly linked to the amount of milk intake & sleep he gets; and I was beginning to get worried that my baby is going to have a brain the size of a pea).

The first week was also the peak of excitement. Even when Kabeer was napping, we would stand by his crib & watch him sleep & admire his sleepy expressions.

By the second week came the realisation that exhaustion catches up with you & that sleeping is important. I also realised that there are two kinds of moms -- the ones who stress too much & the others who don't. I probably am the worst kind of mom in the first category, although I so want to be the bindaas mom of the second category. Having realised that I'm stressing too much, didn't help though; as I still continue to stress over my struggles with breast feeding (by the way, whoever said that breastfeeding is a natural instinct is going to rot in hell) & the erraticness of Kabeer's sleep.

It's week #3. I can't remember when was the last time I had a peaceful nap or a peaceful anything for the matter. Yet, whenever I'm not with Kabeer, I miss him.


Jas Bhambra said...

Ahhh...the joys (and sweet pains) of parenthood... :)
Try and get as much rest you can (easier said than done!).
Take care. Give my love to Kabeer.

666 said...

hmm.. thats so nice. I would be very interested in reading Kabeer's father's diary as well :-)

Yasho said...

Many many many hugs to you!
You're going to be a good mom no matter how you believe otherwise.

Parth said...

I think by the end of the year, you could write an entire book on your experiences :)

iamyuva said...

:) with kids(boys)--parents has to struggle till they are 10yr then after its peace..
with gal kids- its almost peaceful for first 10yr then struggle there after..

clickable said...

Aah, no wonder Kabeer hasn't blogged in a while :) Try to catch winks when ever you can.

Moi said...

:) your post so reminds me of Rachel in Friends......there's this one scene where she goes, "I miss Emma when I am not around her......I miss her so much....Like, I miss her right now"..and her li'l baby Emma is right in front of her eyes in the crib........and Phoebe and Monica look at each other in total bewilderment with that look that says "New moms must be nuts" ......:DDDD

Have fun....and hope baby fairies come to your rescue every time you or Kabeer have a fit...

take care! :)

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kaya said...

Sorry for the late comment jaan. Been a bit mad. But no doubt nothing compared to the elation and frustration you must be alternatively feeling.
LOL! At times like this you think throwing up in the beginning was the easier thing.
Inshallah he will setlle down. As for breast feeding its not at all as easy as the midwife makes it look. And each baby suckles differently.
The midwife at Corniche hospital was great, but my second one yowled her head off for a year, and it would be 24/7. Colicky all the time.
Eat well, and look after yourself jaani, no matter how hard it seems. I neglected myself and am now bearing the consequences.
If needed get a pump and let hubs take over some of the feeds.
Once again bohat bohat mubarak ho.