Monday, September 22, 2008

Try not to judge me...

I've never blogged about my sub-conscious before; but last night I had the most ridiculous dream ever. It was so monumentally over-the-top, I had to post it. So here's how it goes:

The dream started off somewhere in the near future when the banking industry had collapsed & there were only about 100 jobs left in the industry globally. Everyone else was fired. So we moved back to India, rented a small place in Dharavi(!!) & lived through some very difficult times.

Then, one day, a head hunter called: "There's an opening. Mithun is making a movie & wants to cast a new actress opposite him. You had mentioned in your resume that you would do any kind of work except act in a Mithun movie. But these are desperate times. What do you say?" I weighed my options. We hadn't eaten in days & I thought that H deserved a better life. It was a difficult decision, but I said yes.

On my first day of shooting, I met Mithun. He looked at me for a few seconds & said, "You do know that I sleep with all the actresses I work with?". What the --??? Did he just come on to me? I was shaking with rage: "How dare you, Mithun-da? Have you noticed how old you are? What do you take me for? I need the money; but I need my dignity more!". I tore the cheque to pieces & stormed out of the studio.

Now, there was another man on the sets watching this whole scene. It was Sanjay Leela Bhansali (I'm not making this up!!!) And he was thinking to himself, "Thats the kind of woman I want to make my next movie about". So SLB walked up to me and offered me 50 million to make a movie based on my life. I was over-the-moon elated. He wanted to cast Ash to play my character, but I told him about how she had ruined all his previous movies for me & that I would prefer Sushmita Sen to play my character. He saw my point :)

With our 50 million, H & I started a small micro-finance company in Mumbai to help the rural poor. It was a satisfying life.

No, its not over yet....Finally, Barrack Obhama in the presidential debate, cited me as an example of exemplary resilience needed in these tough economic times!!!

23 comments:

a question of a question said...

Dreams say something.

I think you should skip the whole Job Loss - Dharavi - Starving - Movie Offer - Mithun's Indecent Proposal - SLB - 50 Million thing and consider setting-up a micro financing firm seriously. It would do the country men good and it would do you good.

Although i cannot guarantee Barack citing you "as an example of exemplary resilience needed in these tough economic times!!!" but you may win a noble and would be affectionately known as Ma Radha / Radha Tai or Radha Ben

J said...

lol!!! :D

Radha said...

A Q of a Q,
Hey, you know what, I would love to do that. Except between H & I we dont have a shred of entrepreneurial fibre.
But, I quite fancy the Nobel!! :)

J,
:D

Nilesh said...

You remember a lot from the dream. I never have such nice dreams! :) I mean they are nice when you read them. But why Mithun???

Radha said...

Nilesh,
I don't have the vaguest idea why Mithun appeared in my dream!!! yikes! :)

Sneha said...

man - this was hilarious, Radha!
why SLB? are you a big fan of his movies?

btw - agree with you on replacing Aish with Sush.. ;-)

Parth said...

LOL! That was hilarious and no, I am not judging you.

Radha said...

Sneha,
Hell, no! I thought Devdas was the most colossal waste of Indian rupees ever. No idea why SLB!!

Parth,
So you dont think I need therapy? :D

Sneha said...

Radha - totally agree with you on Devdas! Such a waste of money!

Btw, did you watch Rock On? Good movie! :-)

Satyajit said...

it would help if you recollect what you smoked/snorted/had the evening before the dream.
therapy is an interesting option.

i am seeing a therapist...we meet 3 times a week....she says i am making progress....her name is Smirnoff

Radha said...

Sneha,
Yup, watched "Rock On"; quite liked it. Loved some of the songs, loved Purab Kohli, liked Farhan & Arjun too.

Satyajit,
hehe, it wasn't something I smoked or drank, it was just a mixture of stress, tiredness from a long work week, too much of Obhama & banking on TV & some bored imagination!

Priyanka said...

Hi Radha, Got here from your orkut page. I didn't know how else to contact you, as I'm unable to leave a scrap there. Just wanted to know ,did you attend Deo-Nadkarni classes in 8th/9th std? Wondering if you are the same Radha that I know.

Kanishka Agiwal said...

LOL!!! That was hilarious. Mithun-da, oldie-goldie making a pass. Oyeee!!

I am still on my Russian mafia dreams. And I am in Singapore next month. Are you there by any chance?

Moi said...

haha......no, you aren't off your rocker...just plain funny, even in your dreams :)))

666 said...

Ohh that was cracking.. haha... Mithun da's scheme of work was the most amusing ho ho.

Theres a song by Aerosmith .. allow me to sing it for you

Dream on, dream on, dream on .. dream on till your dream comes true!

amna said...

oh gosh, thats hilarious!

Radha said...

Kanishka,
Yes, very much in Singapore. When do you plan to come?

Moi,
:)

666,
I'm not sure I want that dream to come true!! :)

Amna,
I know! I couldn't believe it the next morning!!

sivaluk_htn said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kanishka Agiwal said...

I am there from the 10th to 15th of Oct. And have the 11th and 12th to catch up with friends.

mookuthi said...

Radha you are so funny...i was laughing out loud:D.... Atleast in your dreams you have a movie offer...I am still dreaming that i may dream where iam an actress lol... good one...I am waiting for your posts to come.Cheers

shakester said...

HOLY wow.

mithun, you too????!!
tch tch.

and...suhmita?

shakester said...

.

Radha said...

Shakester,
Its the hormones, I tell you!!